Saturday, July 15, 2006

Fucktard Central

This was my local grocery store tonight. I went down to the local Fry's for a few items and had to find something to clamp down on before I was even inside the store. Every single example of stupid humanity was there. It was like a fucking bug light. They all just kind of buzzed around, got in my way, and made me hate them in less time then it takes to change a radio station. I couldn't even find a parking space without ignorant assholes pulling out in front of me. There were smokers standing around out front of the store, like Jay and Silent Bob. Only stupider. And real.

Inside the store was no better. I just wanted a couple of sodas and a bottle of milk. 3 items, total. It took me 29 minutes to get back OUT OF THE FUCKING STORE. Why, you ask? That's simple, intrepid reader: the idiocy was more concentrated inside. I grabbed my items and went to stand in line. I guess Saturday night is "Try to Buy your Beer with Food Stamps" night. The woman in question could not understand why she was not allowed to buy shit with my tax dollars. The idiot cashier, who looked like she just fell out her mother last week, certainly couldn't explain it. Given that the line was long and getting longer (because all the scum had to shop at Fry's tonight), I decided to use one of the self checkout stations.

This was a mistake. The line wasn't long for those, but there is a very good reason for that fact. PEOPLE CANNOT FOLLOW SIMPLE VERBAL INSTRUCTIONS. The damn machine doesn't make it hard. It tells you what to do, EVERY SINGLE TIME. In small words. It's really easy to do. Scan, touch the yellow pad, bag the fucking thing. And somehow, this is too hard for people to do.

There are rumblings that World War 3 is starting. After one trip to the local grocery store, I hope these rumblings are true. The peace and quiet will be nice.

1 comment:

John said...

Then, of course, after leaving the store, having to push the shopping cart that someone left behind your car because they're too lazy to push it five feet to the 'cart return bay'.

Then, heading out the lane, someone cutting across the parking lot and nearly taking out every car running down the 'one way' lanes, including the ones driving the wrong way in the one way